Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Without

Long before I was pregnant with EC I knew that being a mom was something I wanted, and something I would surely be good at. And now that I have two happy, healthy, loving little boys I feel even stronger about those things. However, I can't help but wonder what I'd do if I didn't have them anymore, you know, if God decided to take them away. You're right, what kind of person thinks those kind of thoughts? I can't help it, I hear about this tragedy happening every single day and cannot imagine what those parents go through. I simply cannot.

I realize I have zero poetic skills so bear with me. The other night I just couldn't sleep to save my life. These dark thoughts kept creeping into my brain and no amount of wishing them away was going to help. So I rolled out of bed (at 3:30am if you must know, shortly after Alec's 2am feeding) and opened my computer to write down the things I love most about my boys. 

Now it's not always rainbows and sunshine here, more times than not someone is crying, yelling, being told no or throwing a fit but it's during those times that I need to step back and realize what I have and some parents no longer have: two boys I cannot live without.
Without Question

Without question
without doubt
I never ever 
want to be without

Without the laughter
the giggles and cries
the midnight wakings
and lullaby's

Without the little boy
who knows way too much
knows exactly what to say
with words, kisses and such

Without the tickles
the yells and screams
or the silly little games
only young boys can dream

Without the dirty little hands
the tiny little toes
the big bear hugs
I can't live without those

Without the soft curly hair
the smell of freshly bathed skin
the chunky little belly
and the adorable double chin

Without the tiny voice
that softly says my name
"Mama, play with me
Just one more game?"

Without you
I'm afraid to say
I wouldn't want to live
even one more day


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4 comments:

  1. Beautiful, Sherry! Your boys are beyond lucky to have you as their mommy.

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  2. I sit here, in tears, moved beyond words. This is beautiful. And so, so, so, so true. I've said before that you and I are like parallel people, raising two boys in two parts of the country, but going through so many of the same things as a Mom of Boys. This, could have been written from my heart as well...for without THEM, there is no ME. <3

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  3. That's beautiful, Sherry. And so, so true!

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